Operation Ranger Up

What to do?

By
Updated: March 14, 2013
what to do

Editor’s Note: Some of you may know Six from her wildly popular Facebook page: Overly Sensitive Military Wives.  Well, I have been courting, harassing, seducing, asking her to write for us but she doesn’t quite know where to start. After the use of a cattle-prod, Six has been kind enough to offer up several starting points of chaos, I just need you to leave a comment on what you would like to see first.  Thanks, -RU Rob

By RU Contributor SIX

I was told everyone has to run the gauntlet and give details of the stupidest thing they’ve done or witnessed. Unfortunately for me, that takes up 89.43% of my life.

Digging through memory, I start blabbing via the keyboard only to backspace and say ‘No no, that was just a duh moment’. I guess 8% of my life is filled with duh.

With numbers like that I can’t choose between when I got cut off from drinking on Bourbon St for putting a dude in an arm bar, caught with my pants down and throwing green mangos at a ‘you’re going this fast’ sign trying to get it to register, or getting invited to a party only to figure out it was a swingers club and I don’t mean play ground swings. . . And I went.

Truthfully, I cant even narrow it down to those. So I switch gears and think of other times. Those “duh” moments.

Not any easier. Memory conjures up when I went to a FRG meeting not knowing it was for spouses. They invited me thinking I was a wife. Once the flyers for Avon and Tupperware started getting pass around, it hit me and I spent a good hour trying to escape. Then spent the next 5 months dodging all those wives who thought I was there sizing them up so I could sleep with their husbands.

My brain quickly reminds me of how I was sitting next to Wesley Snipes on a plane and argued the origins of Tae kwon do. He said Africa. I said he was stupid for arguing with an Asian about it. Doesn’t sound like much except I didnt know it was him and kept calling him one of the Wayans brothers.

Even the one time I fell asleep with Nair on my legs and ended up going to a function looking like a Class A experiment for the CDC creeps into view.

I can’t talk about the alcohol infused times. That would be an acknowledgement they happened. Anything that was photographed, videoed, or somehow made it on the local news – I try to deny.

So I’m sorry. I don’t have a single stupid moment that I can decide on. But thats okay, because I’m a chick and we never can make up our minds anyway.

8 Comments

  1. Sarah

    March 14, 2013 at 8:39 am

    Love it! Just write about completely random stuff- ya know– life experiences- Crazy shit you did in your military career- or even in life. I’m sure that pic you have of you and the cigar ash on your tongue is an amusing time to hear about!!

  2. David

    March 14, 2013 at 9:16 am

    I think Sixer should write about the origins of her OSMW page, different classes of Dependa’s and where/how she comes up with much of the funny one liners she posts daily!

  3. Carol Campbell

    March 14, 2013 at 10:33 am

    HAHAHA!! My outlook exactly. Great humor. I think we should have both been guys in a previous life.

  4. Renee Nay Nay Swain

    March 14, 2013 at 11:53 am

    LOVED this Sixers!!!! Just another reason why we all LOVE you from OSMV.

  5. Mr. Twisted

    March 14, 2013 at 3:08 pm

    Any story involving Wesley Snipes looking foolish is clearly Den-worthy; but would be all the better if you could somehow get a shot in at Steven Seagal.

  6. Kim

    March 15, 2013 at 12:12 am

    I’m so glad they twisted your arm! I love reading your Facebook page. It’s been a wonderful source of entertainment while my husband’s deployed. You have no idea how many insomnia filled nights I’ve spent giggling over your page. I’m looking forward to your blogs on here!
    P.S. I think you should continue pointing out the flaws of the OSMWs’ on here. Their drama beats any that Lifetime network can conjure up!

  7. Gunship Load

    March 19, 2013 at 10:54 am

    Six,

    Welcome to the Den!

    My wife reads me your writings from OSMW, I would read them myself but I refuse to get a facebook thingy.

  8. Lynette

    March 20, 2013 at 8:48 pm

    Six, I second David’s comment. I would love to hear what you were thinking when OSMW came to be! Oh and maybe a list of the ever growing dependa names.

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