By SGT Awesome An Open Letter To Army Chief of Staff, General...
The Girls of Ranger Up
Photos of the Girls of Ranger Up
Who are the Ranger Up Girls and how did YOU GUYS get them?
There is no question that this is our most frequently asked question. It has even become one of the more popular questions on many great military blogs. So here’s how it all got started:
Never Trust Girls Under the Age of 25
We had the models lined up for our first photo shoot well in advance. Many girls told us they were going to be there, and we focused on other details, like for example, building an entire bedroom in a studio, props, planning, etc. We thought we had everything locked up tight – I mean, you know, everyone said they were going to be there, so why wouldn’t they come?
Here’s why – they have no sense of responsibility. 12 hours before the shoot we basically had every girl but Kelly Bruno, who is now our first sponsored athlete, dream up some lame excuse why they couldn’t come, including “I’ve had a real hectic week”. Because they weren’t guys who we could just taunt or beat the living shit out of for failing us so miserably (Note: We don’t condone violence – this is just, you know, a term we use), we had to focus on solving the problem…so we did what any other newly minted business owner would do – we hammered back a few shots and went to some local pubs looking for talent. Our criteria were as follows:
1) Too hot to rightfully want to go out with any of us. 2) Extremely cool. 3) Pro-Military.
No Mission too Large for the Guys at Ranger Up
In two hours we met and drafted Caroline, Angela, Jenn, and Grace, all of whom did an absolutely phenomenal job.
This is the part where we could pretend to be “pimps” but that isn’t us. We just happen to be pretty fearless. Our line was seriously this lame:
“Hi, my name is Choose One: (Nick, Brad, Adam, Brian). There’s no way that I can ask what I am about to ask without this sounding like a pick-up line, but here goes: We are starting up a military apparel company and we have a photo shoot tomorrow. We had a few girls bail out at the last minute, and we need a few more people. We think you’d be absolutely perfect for our shoot. Would you be interested?”
After our “strong” opener (I know what you’re thinking – how is that pickup line not listed in the greatest of all time right next to “F*ck me if I’m wrong, but is your name Gretchen?”), you can imagine the type of responses we received:
“Are you guys for real?”
“This sounds shady.”
“I don’t know…I mean, I don’t even know you.”
Apparently, we all have a certain propensity for BS, because as I was blathering on about trusting me because of the inherent code of honor associated with the Ranger Creed (I even recited it for one girl who doubted the veracity of our identities. I’m so ashamed – I expect to take some shit over this one), I remember thinking “This is actually working.”
And work it did. Adam came through. Brian (my hero) convinced one girl to come to the shoot from his very distant location in FLORIDA, and Brad and I came up with the other two.
7 Hours Later
When you are at a photo shoot that you have a lot of money invested in, a photographer standing by, and a ton of props that you have carted to a distant location with your buddy’s truck, you don’t like to be waiting at 7:30 AM for girls to show up – especially when you met them at 1:00 AM the “night” before in a bar and they have no reason to trust you at all.
But, sure enough, the first two girls show up! Angela and Caroline were a little freaked out when they arrived because we were shooting in an industrial part of town and they had only arrived in NC the night before (Welcome!), so I invited them into the studio to meet the photographer Greg, who is a great guy, extremely professional, and an Air Force vet. This meeting should have done wonders for trust-building, but instead, the girls walked in to see the following:
1) The makeup artist was oiling up a shirtless Alex for the picture as he was sitting on the edge of the bed. 2) Kelly was pulling her shirt over her head (wearing a sports bra) but for a millisecond it appeared she was getting nekkid. (Nekkid = Naked, but with “bad” intentions).
The girls turned white, as I rushed to assure them that this was not going to be porn. Somehow they believed me, and the rest is history.
The New Girls
We just completed our second photo shoot and we’d also like to introduce you to Lindsay, Rebecca, Nikki, and Jenny. They are gorgeous and a lot of fun to work with. We hope that we’ve maintained our high standard of recruiting women that are WAY out of our league to take their clothes off for you.