The Damn Few Contest

Updated: November 28, 2012


By RU Rob

We haven’t given away anything on The Rhino Den for a long time.  In honor of our cool little short cut to all of “The Damn Few” (which is located on the right hand side of the page and down a little) I am going to give some Ranger Up gift certificates away.  Just in time for your holiday needs.  All you have to do is this:

Tell us your favorite Damn Few moments and why.  Leave them in the comment section below, and be sure to leave a good email address (I am the only one that can see them).  In 24 hours I, along with the other Rhino Den writers, will judge and select the winner.  First place will receive a $50 Ranger Up Gift Certificate, Second and Third will both receive a $25 Ranger Up Gift Certificate.  I will announce the winners here and contact you via email.

Oh and one more thing…if you have never posted here before, we moderate our comments so there is no spam.  So there is no need try and post something 3-4 times if you don’t see it pop up right away, we will get to it!

And if you can’t find the way to the page of The Damn Few on your own, I’ve got your back… just click here!





  1. Will

    November 28, 2012 at 8:19 pm

    ‘ARF ARF ARF!!!’

  2. Andres Ramos

    November 28, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    I have to say its one of the funniest conversations where sealy freaks out about the kid in a pirate halloween costume and ends up blowing off his head and everyone else is just shocked because he permanently ruin halloween. I had a similar situation (without someone actually dying…) we went to a party and he saw someone in a hipster costume and proceeded to make sure the individual rangered the f*ck up needless to say were never being invited again

  3. Chas

    November 28, 2012 at 8:54 pm

    Although it went completely out of character, I’d have to go with Sealy’s speech on toughness a few episodes ago. Words after my own heart. Oh and the other guys fucking with him afterwards was classic.

  4. Thomas

    November 28, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    “My dad would have made me assume the position and given me the old walrus horn until I squealed, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I can still feel the whiskers…” This is the best quote from the series so far. People look at you and walk away when you say that too loud in public. They need to Ranger Up!

  5. Luke

    November 28, 2012 at 10:21 pm

    When Diablo Perro accused Army of being a hipster. It’s exactly how my friends and I act towards each other. Also, when Sealy was poking a Hontas. I can still hear his buffalo worshiping screeches.

  6. Daniel F. Belin

    November 28, 2012 at 10:59 pm

    Dear Ranger Up,

    I would most respectfully like to submit my favorite moments from your excellent series, The Damn Few. I hope that this message finds you well and brings a smile to your face in this holiday season, as your episodes of The Damn Few have brought to mine on several occasions. I shall attempt to remain serious throughout this treatise, but of course the excellently balanced comedic tone of your series will render me unable to prevent the introduction of levity into this text. So, we begin:


    Throughout the damn few, Sealy displays characteristics of a transcendental being. He is the only member of The Damn Few’s entourage who exists in a state of vorhandenheit (Present-at-Hand) (Heidegger, 1962)[1], aside from the Ranger Rhino who is clearly a classical Stoic in the fashioning of Marcus Aurelius. He is the true wisdom behind the shallow discourse of the The Damn Few group. His wisdom, is of course masked from the common man by his apparent effeminacy and tendency towards homo-eroticism. Sealy is the true figure looming above the groups latent masculine-effeminate cynicism, as is evident by his glistening meat analogies.

    We will begin with my favorite moment of comedy from The Damn Few, the Buffalo Meat Snowman. What is the Buffalo Meat Snowman? It is a snowman made entire out of the hemoglobinic, well butchered, raw filets of a wild buffalo. The juicy, glistening meat of the Snowman clearly were created by Sealy to satisfy his repressed homoerotic tendencies (Freud, 1932)[2]. Sealy is the embodiment of the effeminate man who is at a metaphysical level far more masculine than the masculine man, however, due to the circular nature of the spectrum of effeminacy-masculinity he is actual the embodiment of the repressed effeminacy of the masculine man (Adorno, 1951)[3]. Sealy is the antithesis to the balanced masculinity of the rest of The Damn Few’s group, and is perhaps the most mentally unstable of them all. A trained psychoanalyst such as Lacan would certainly recommend extensive therapy.

    The next moment, unsurprisingly, is generated yet again by the kindred spirit known as Sealy. He bares his metaphysical core to the group and demonstrates his masculinity–or is it effeminacy? Again, see the circular Adornoian argument here–by delivering a treatise which follows the distinct path of a Hegelian dialectic expressed through the now subdued tones of Sealy. As he delivers possibly the most poignant speech on military leadership and discipline since the famed speech of Patton to his Third Army, the rest of the group stares into the abyss that is Sealy as he transcends to become an Übermensch. Once Sealy is exhausted by his Hegelian dialectic, the group retaliates in a sore moment of reactive harassment. It is to be expect that there should be such an uprising against Sealy the Übermensch.

    The only member of the group to rival Sealy in his metaphysical significance is the Ranger Rhino. Simply dressed, and clearly burdened with the legacy of his forefathers, he is a classical Stoic. He is clearly in a state of Mitsein, one of deep internal reflection. The Rhino is perhaps the most firm on the aforementioned scale of effeminacy-masculinity, a clear masculine-effeminate (see Adorno, 1951 again)[3]. His jokes, often of a sexual nature and often including the sexual anatomy point to a deep homo-erotic and effeminate tendency masked behind the raspy voice of ten thousand cigarettes (Freud, 1905)[4]. However, like a classic Stoic, he represses these tendencies and hide behind a quite facade of masculinity. He is diametrically opposed to the Sealy-Übermensch transcendental being.

    This internet viewing experience is perhaps the most important of our time. It is clear that the original creators did not hope for the creation of the Sealy-Übermensch being, which is of course still in a state of Geworfenheit. From a purely Freudian-Lacanian psychoanalytic perspective, Sealy-Übermensch is perhaps the highest Being (strictly in a Heideggerian sense) to exist on the Internet. Normal Sealy is the embodiment of the repressed Sealy-Übermensch, as evidenced by the clear distortion of his semantic intentions by his falsely modulated voice. Perhaps this existence is forced by the common overpowerment of the dialectic by the Ranger Rhino Stoic. It is clear that the true Sealy lies below the mask of the glistening snowmen of meat yonder as the greatest Übermensch to exist, the SEEÜBERHUND, the Being created as a result of the Geworfenheit of Sealy’s repressed form through Hegelian dialectic to its full potential.

    NEXT TIME ON PSYCHOANALYTIC ANALYSIS OF THE DAMN FEW: An Analysis of the next episode of The Damn Few against the Course of General Linguistics (Saussure, 1926)

    I hope you enjoyed this message. I hope it has enlightened you on the true significance of the speech of Sealy and of his Buffalo Meat Snowman. I hope this finds you well.

    Your resident amateur psychoanalyst,


    1. Heidegger M., trans. Macquarrie J. and Robinson E. (1962) Being and Time, New York: Harper & Row.

    2. Freud, S. (1932) New Introductory Lectures on Psychoanalysis, New York, NY: W.W Norton & Co.

    3. Adorno, T. (1951). Tough Baby. In Adorno, T. , Minima Moralia (pp. 45-46). London: Verso.

    4. Freud, S. (1905) The Joke and Its Relation to the Unconscious. Lepzig: Deuticke.

  7. GI Joey

    November 29, 2012 at 12:18 am

    “Did you like that, ranger boy? Did you like when he was in Con-Air?”
    “But I liked Con-Air! Nicolas Cage, Nicolas Cage, Ar-ar-ar!”
    For everyone who hated Nicolas Cage in Con-Air, that is by far the best moment. Nuff said.

  8. Antonio Aguilar

    November 29, 2012 at 1:09 am

    Sealy shooting the kid in the pirate costume! He seems like such a pansy but as soon as the topic of pirates come up he’s a killer.

    That or Rhino saying “I’ve go so much testosterone, if I shake a man’s hand he isn’t allowed to compete in the fucking Olympics!” I love that.

  9. Justin W.

    November 29, 2012 at 4:22 am

    My favorite clip is when Rhino explains why the Fourth of July is the best holiday of them all.

    Thanksgiving is just an excuse for people to over eat and get fat then fall asleep watching the same crappy football games each year. Christmas is when you have to buy cheap gifts for family you barely know all the while smiling and trying to seem sincere when you thank Aunt Edna for the 20th pair of crocheted socks. New Years Eve is when you get sh*t faced to try forget how crappy last year was and enough liquid courage to think you’ll change in the year to come. Easter is a basket full of fake grass, pastel colors, and a chocolate rabbit that breaks your teeth. St. Patrick’s Day is only cool because if you play it right you can piss green. Halloween is just an excuse for women to dress like slu…umm yeah we’ll skip this one.

    But the Fourth of July, now that is a holiday. We commemorate telling the Brits to f’ off by drinking beers, grilling steaks, and top it all off by blowing stuff up. ‘Nuff said.

  10. Daniel

    November 29, 2012 at 8:32 am

    I would say my favorite moment is when he calls him “Lefemme Dogita.” It is so simple but freaking hilarious. I have found myself saying it all day! (Excuse the grammar, coffee has not kicked in yet)

  11. Mike Assad

    November 29, 2012 at 8:47 am

    Yeah what Daniel Belin said!

  12. Mike Vaughan

    November 29, 2012 at 8:59 am

    There are many:, Sealy explanation of the .45% in ep 5, All referenced to the Air Force playing Golf as PT. But but the best by far, episode 1 and the coffee.

    “Coffee is supposed to be black, fuck head.!
    You know what I take in my coffee?
    Caffeine and hate.
    Yes,…and sometimes whiskey”

  13. Jon L.

    November 29, 2012 at 9:13 am

    The entire series is way too funny, everything Sealy says has me in tears. Gunny and Ranger Rhinos dialogue back and froth makes it for me.. Sounds like the same bs me and my army and marine friends say back ad forth to each other all the time. My favorite has to be when Gunny is talking about Nicholas Cage as and army range and Rhino is just puking all over the place.

    Sean Connery and Chuck Norris in the same scence WILL Cause the apocalypse.

  14. Eng

    November 29, 2012 at 9:29 am

    Easily has to be when Diablo Perro and Rhino are debating about who has better war landings, and Rhino goes “How about that time when I crossed the Potomac, killed some Hessians and brits, you may recall, it was when i won your FUCKING INDEPENDENCE”. Oh snap.

  15. Josh Loner

    November 29, 2012 at 9:30 am

    I got to say may favorite line had to be in the thanksgiving episode. When old Devil Dog says “Well I guess we are gonna have to kill them all and take their land,…I Love It Here”. And then the tomahawk flies into Sealy’s hat and Ranger Rhino says “You can throw these things”.

  16. Jim

    November 29, 2012 at 9:45 am

    “What’d you say?”
    “I said you’re a pair of skinny jeans away from being a GAWDDAMNED hipster!”
    Kills me every time.

  17. lance

    November 29, 2012 at 10:03 am

    Sealy and the pirate is the best one

  18. Kevin Dunn

    November 29, 2012 at 10:09 am

    Episode 1 and the explanation of what coffee should be. It is the reason I had to stop watching on my phone. After that my phone sat in a bag of rice for a week to dry out after I aspirated my coffee and spit it all over my phone.

  19. Charles VK

    November 29, 2012 at 10:25 am

    When Devil dog tells Ranger Rhino to take advantage of all the other chances to get fucked up. Then he points to the door, “for fucks sake, even coasties ass joins in on the fun.” “What the hell are you supposed to be anyway?” And coastie replies in that gay voice with a lisp or some shit…well I’m Kevin Costners character… And Devil dog interrupts, I don’t really give a fuck! Hilarious. Because you have the first scene with coastie and you have him as a fucking duck w/ a life preserver. I played that shit over and over and it still ain’t fuckin’ old.

  20. Turlinator

    November 29, 2012 at 10:41 am

    I thought it was pretty funny when Commander Iscus (the Air Force guy) said that even though corrective training has changed because of PC it isn’t all that different than what it was before. Then Devil Dog says he’s in the Air Force and that he doesn’t know what corrective training is. Hahaha.

  21. GI-Jenn

    November 29, 2012 at 11:43 am

    Maybe I’m too jaded, or just getting old (they may be the same thing), but it takes a lot to make me truly laugh out loud anymore, so I appreciate these videos (’cause they do). I’ll leave a comment on my favorite specific moment and my favorite overall character…

    Best moment: “I’m just saying you’re a pair of skinny jeans away from being a G-D hipster! Hell, you’ve even got the vintage military jacket — classic f&ckin’, anti-war, hipster pussy bull-sh!t!” (LeFemme Dogita) Why? This was one of the best insults I’ve heard in a long time, from the delivery and inflection to the multi-layered social commentary. Plus I hate hipsters. Well done!

    Best overall: Sealy. They’re all funny characters, but Sealy is a riot. From the well-timed closeups where he says nothing but you just see the blank, open eyed stares, to the rant about toughness, to the “PIRATE – AHH!” moments. The list goes on…my favorite line was “I black ops out!” and then he wakes up…”not again!”.


  22. Brian L

    November 29, 2012 at 11:46 am

    I have bits and pieces of each episode that crack me up, so here is a list of my favorite lines!

    Episode 1: Rhino tells Diablo about “that other time when I crossed the Potomac, killed a bunch of Hessians and Brits! You may recall it; it’s when I won your…FUCKING INDEPENDENCE!” “What’s that Gunny, of course you can buy the next round. Eagle: in that case I will take a warm brandy Gunny…Diablo: You’ll get whiskey and like it god dammit.”

    Episode 2: Gunny: “The Expendables are not supposed to be fucking classy, their mean, and tough, and the kind of men who would play tonsil hockey with your wife and not even take out their chaw!” Gunny: “Sean Connery’s the fucking man, I’d let that Scottish fucker have his way with me if he wanted, and you fuckers couldn’t even call it gay”. Rhino: “It’s not gay if it’s Connery”!
    Rhino: “That man hasn’t made one good movie since Raising Arizona, the rest of his catalog is the bag of flaming dog shit on the porch of life”.

    Episode 3 is packed full of great one liners from Rhino: Rhino: “I don’t buy them shit on the first date, I figured I already paid for their freedom”. “Stripclubs!” “I’ve got so much testosterone that if a guy shakes my hand he’s not allowed to compete in the fucking Olympics!” “I just skip straight to the sex.” “There is no fucking way I’m doing this……I won’t fucking do it…….I won’t fucking do it…..fuck.”

    Episode 4: Rhino: “No fucking way he just showed up as Tubbs, you cum dumpsters fucking planned that shit.” Eagle: “I don’t think bemoaning us as receptacle’s of birthing fluid is an appropriate response.” Rhino: “This year I decided I was going as the scariest motherfucker alive, didn’t even need a costume.” Rhino: “Kiss my ass toyful douche!” Diablo: “I’m just saying that you’re a pair of skinny jeans away from being a god damn hipster.”

    Episode 5: Rhino: “For once I agree with LeFemme Dogita.” “My dick has done more corrective training than you.” Eagle: “I’m not even sure what that means and frankly I’m more than a little aggravated that I now have images of your fallace dancing in my head.” Rhino: “I bet you like that don’t you? You fucking meat gazer.” Diablo: “Fucking butt pirate.” Sealy: “Pirate!” as he draws his gun!

    Episode 6: The only thing I can say about this one is that I love the squealing buffalo sounds from Sealy as he is taking the Chief’s daughter, and finally made his buffalo meat snowman.

  23. RSchneid

    November 29, 2012 at 12:18 pm

    Wpisode 2:
    Devildog: “do you like that rangerboy? When he was in Con Air?…….Con Air.”
    Seally: “Yay. Nicholas Cage! Nicholas Cage! Nicholas Cage! I love Nicholas Cage! AR AR AR!

    Because Fuck Nicholas cage, and RLTW.

  24. wobly

    November 29, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    There are so many funny moments, it is hard to select just one. Rhino’s statements about the 4th of July being the best holiday are spot on. The Thanksgiving episode was hilarious, as a whole, but the comment about the tomahawks was great! “You can throw these things?!?”

  25. Stein

    November 29, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    The only easy day was yesterday, Squaw… Ring the Bell. Fantastic.

  26. Rich

    November 29, 2012 at 1:33 pm

    Sealy’s reaction to the word pirates. I end up with coffee (or whatever) coming out my nose every time!

  27. Kurt

    November 29, 2012 at 1:39 pm

    The Thanksgiving episode was great. Rhino getting the tomahawk like a kid in the candy store. “you can throw these things! F* yea!”
    Diablo ” these f*ers are going to kill us”
    Rhino “yep”
    Diablo “guess we will have to kill them all and seize their land. I like it here”


  28. Kyle

    November 29, 2012 at 2:06 pm

    Easily when Sealy tells Ahontas “The only easy day was yesterday squaw!” hilarious way to thread in the SEALS motto and be completely racially insensitive. Loved it!

  29. Dan

    November 29, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    “I’m a top secret navy seal!” Now everytime I read a news article about the Seals that’s all I think of. Seriously great line. And my favorite time it is used is when sealy is porking hontas. Laugh every damn time.

  30. Tom

    November 29, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    Definitely when Sealy goes out of character and gives his lecture on toughness. While the rest of the clips are hilarious, that speech sums up so of what I see at work and among my peers. I work as a scribe in the ER (basically a pre-health internship); the hours aren’t great and neither is the pay, but it is not hard work by any stretch of the imagination. The reality of a 1 AM or 3 AM shift is just too much for some of people and they will quit on the spot while knowing it takes several months to get a replacement on board. To hear them complain you would think the world is ending. Or another huge ordeal for them is a party came up after the schedule came out. We are all supposed to be adults, but the number of people who still live off mommy and daddy is appalling. The idea that work takes a higher precedence than pissing around blows their collective little worlds.

  31. Paul

    November 29, 2012 at 5:03 pm

    The Expandables 2

    “Sean Connery and Chuck Norris in the same scene might trigger the Apocalypse!”

    That whole episode was great…

    “..It’s not Gay if its Sean Connery!”

    then making him puke over CONAIR… awesome…

    Thanks for the laughs!

  32. Wardy

    November 29, 2012 at 5:03 pm

    Your lazy eye looking at Sealy’s dog dish hat…. or
    I like my coffee with caffeine and hate… and sometimes whiskey.

  33. Robert

    November 29, 2012 at 5:03 pm

    Because getting struck by Lighting sucks… 😉

  34. Tom

    November 29, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    The whole Sealy and hauntus scene from the spirits talking to the buffalo meat snowman. “The only easy day was yesterday”.

  35. Deb Boyce

    November 29, 2012 at 5:05 pm

    “Coffee is supposed to be black, fuckhead!”
    “You know what I take in my coffee?”
    “Caffeine and hate.”
    “Yes… and sometimes whiskey.”

  36. Amber Cook

    November 29, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    For me it has to be Rhino’s Holiday A.A.R.! Simply because thats how I pretty much feel about all the holidays in general

  37. Dennis

    November 29, 2012 at 5:07 pm

    Favorite moment is during the halloween episode when the rhino breaks down how he is in costume, that this year he decided to go as the scariest mother***ker alive

  38. Will Black

    November 29, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    My favorite moment is Sealy’s moment of clarity and complete shift in character when he explains the problems with the current generations inability to understand toughness and sacrifice.

    As a man who is utterly frightened of group-think and Yes-men, I purposely hang out with people I completely disagree with. My best friend from high school will tell straight-up that he is a communist, most of my battle-buddies from the Army are die-hard Republicans, and one of my favorite things to do is get my Muslim and Jewish friends in the same room at the same time. I like have having differing opinions around me since I think living in a microcosmic bubble of political/social/moral thought is dangerous.

    That being said, it gets difficult to explain to some of these people (particularly my commie friend and one of my liberal as hell Muslim buddies) why I see the world the way I do. I’ve tried countless times to sum it up but they always seem to brush it off as me being anachronistic or just crazy.

    And yet somehow a fucking poorly animated seal on the tail end of a web-cartoon blacks out and explains my views on military culture juxtaposed to the modern, entitled youth culture so perfectly that I have yet to get one rebuttal from any of my friends outside of “well…. uh, that’s gay.”

    I have the video saved, and I bust it out and skip to that part to shut up people when we argue. So yeah, that’s my favorite part. Not just for the clarity of the message that Sealy gives, but also for the fact that a god damn cartoon can shut down an argument by self-style intellectuals. If a cartoon can shut you up in a couple of minutes then you are either full of shit or your entire worldview is wrong. Thank you for that, RU Team.

    –Will Black

  39. Ryan Z

    November 29, 2012 at 5:14 pm


  40. Kodey

    November 29, 2012 at 5:30 pm

    I still crack up at the Halloween one where devil douche says:

    For fucks sake, even Coastys ass joins in on the fun! What the hell you suppose to be anyways?

    Coasty: well Im Kevin Costner’s character…

    Devil Dog: I dont really give a fuck!! The point is, you dressed up!

    Cracks me up every time!!!

  41. Josh C

    November 29, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    episode 6 Gunny: looks like we’re gonna have to kill all these fuckers, and steel thier land. i love it here.

  42. Mike L

    November 29, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    Im no phsyco-analyst, so my reply will be much shorter than a few others. I love The Damn Few, and check every week for new episodes. I had not seen Act of Valor before watching The Damn Few and making the connection, Thanks for that also, Fkn Great Movie! Anyway, on to my favorite TDF moment. I love episode 1 when Rhino and Devil Dog are comparing campaigns and Rhino replies” And what about that other time… when I crossed the Potomac, killed a bunch of Hetians and Brits… remember that, oh yea its when I won your FKN INDEPENDENCE!!!!” …. OH SNAP!…….. “I also love the quote: I DONT BUY WEOMEN SHIT, I FIGURE I ALREADY PAID FOR THEIR FREEDOM!”

  43. Tim Cluey

    November 29, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    My favorite moment was when they were discussing who would be a better choice for expendables 3 than nicholas cage. And he says even that anoying kid from the transformers.

  44. Nieto, Sean

    November 29, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    I’m gonna have to say the Halloween when sealy says “pirates!” And shoots the shit out of the little kid I was dying

  45. Joseph Girmann

    November 29, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    I have to say my current favorite Damn Few moment, was when Sealy went on the monologue about how toughness is earned.
    It is rare that the issues in today’s society are so eloquently put. Yes, we all bitch and talk about “Back in my day” However the reasons are often left in the dark or at best given the “People are pussies” explanation. Not only did it really put things in perspective for me. But it also gave me a whole lot of usable monologue myself when explaining things to my civilian friends and family. You guys do an excellent job mixing humor and usable facts and monologues for day to day life.
    I think it’s important for leaders, even junior ones to know the causes of the issues. And you guys do a great job of explaining it. Without knowing why something is a problem we cannot, as leaders fix it. Using your guys’ input and even stealing your monologues (such as Sealys) has helped me as a soldier and as a junior leader of soldiers. I appreciate all the work you guys do and I really enjoy The Damn Few videos you put up. Keep up the good work and I’ll keep buying the clothes as money allows.

  46. Clif A

    November 29, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    I’m just glad you have Army in the old Vietnam utilities instead of these damn useless ACU’s. All of them are completely in character, exaggerated, but awesome! Of my best friends, two of them were Marines and the other is a retired Chair Force sergeant. He proudly brags that he never worked a day in his career. Heck, he was deployed, to CHARLESTON. ON THE DAMN BEACH. The Marine types, well, I just tell them it’s good to have a few we can teach to go lay on the barbed wire so the Army can come in and win the wars. They usually just start bragging about how they were in the men’s department of the Navy.

    Either way, just thanks for the entertainment. Being stuck out here on deployment blows, as I’m sure most of us know. Keep up the great work. And to all my brothers that I’ve worked hard just now to offend, thanks for doing what you do. Serve Proud. FIX BAYONETS! -out.

  47. Matt

    November 29, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    Hey, no fair! Daniel Belin got all smart and such and wrote a research paper with smart words and citations and what not. How are we supposed to compete with that?!

    Anyways, I was going to say my favorite moment was when Sealy went all nuts and killed the pirate, but somebody already said that. So, while I sit here in the Thomas Cooper library at University of South Carolina, instead of working on my research paper on Civil War battles in the South, I decided to re-watch the episodes and pick a new favorite moment. Then I got distracted by some other videos and before I knew it, I was in the dark, dark corners of YouTube where no man should ever go. We’ve all been there, you know. Anyways, my favorite part of the series is that opening disclaimer that’s on every video. Especially the part where you mention that no one knows the Dewey Decimal system anymore and that it’s sad. Lets face it, it’s a tragedy. Now pick mine so I can get a gift certificate!!! Please. (I have manners and such)

  48. Wade Wilson

    November 29, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    My favorite moment is when the kids are trick or treating and then Sealy goes absolutely apeshit and guns down that kid who says he’s a pirate. Best. Moment. Ever.

    Oh and up until that time, no one was expecting Sealy to pull of something like that. I know I didn’t…

  49. Ricky M.

    November 29, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    Gunny calling Rhino a hipster and everything that entails a hipster. Why? Well, pretty much the only way to offend the unoffendable, disgruntled vet is to call him a hipster/hippie or what not. And his reaction by threatening to shoot him (racking it and all) is classic. I’m not saying I’d do the same…actually no, I probably would.

  50. Caleb W

    November 29, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    I think my favorite moment was when the first episode popped up. Wasn’t sure what to expect from the guys who have their own physically demanding work-out video and emotionally moving music videos. Fortunately you guys stayed true to form with hard hitting truths and accurate portrayals of soldiers, marines, airmen, and seamen alike. I had found something that hit near and dear to my heart and the whole family could enjoy.

    But in all seriousness, I’d have to go with the Expendables talk and Sealy’s monologue about toughness promptly followed by the Sealy Kit.

  51. Kev Mitchell

    November 29, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    Hipster. ‘Nuff said.

  52. Anthony

    November 29, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    I liked when sealy got drunk and said something I never could really put into words. The way Sealy spoke about how society just pampers everyone and everyone expects something really made me stop and watch 3 more times just because it is what I have been trying to tell people for years now. Without this cartoon I really do not think I would have been able to find anyway to put all my views into such a concise statement.

  53. McShagdaddy

    November 29, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    “I don’t think we should start calling them redskins, it seems rather derogatory.” “Oh, come on, its not like I’m building a sports team in our new nation’s capital with the name or anything!” Amazing videos, keep up the great work!

  54. Zach

    November 30, 2012 at 1:57 am

    My favorite moment is in the second episode, when Gunny and the Rhino (not sure what his name is… whatever, he’s a bad ass) are talking shit back and forth. The conversation goes like this:

    ‘You fuckin’ Rangers and Normandy. You get one beach landing and a hundred movies about it. What about all the landings we’ve had? Tarawa, Iwo Jima, Guadalcanal, Saipan… I could go on all night.’

    ‘So can your mother.’


    I’m a Marine and my best friend is one of you fuckin’ Hooahs. I’m pretty sure we’ve actually had this exact conversation. I love it because it totally captures the way service members (especially from different branches) talk to one another. It’s all shit talking and bragging, but somehow it conveys an unstated sense of deep affection and respect for the other person in the conversation.

    Sealy’s momentary lapse into sanity and glibness also rates pretty high. It completely captured my view on society today.

    This is a wonderful site, keep up the fantastic work.


  55. defensor fortissimo

    November 30, 2012 at 6:23 am

    I have a tendency to over-analyze these kinds of things. My apologies in advance if I go slightly off the reservation.
    /// ////

    I wouldn’t neccesarily say I have a favorite moment,as of yet this show hasn’t really had a weak spot. I would say that a favorite theme is your ability to build up the best and worst stereotypes of each branch and manage to stimaltaneously support and subvert them. For example having the RU rhino be your sterotypical hard assed grunt one moment and then quoting Plato the next. Or having Gunny pull out a perfect hipster comparison for RU and being spot on with his analysis.

    Seally presents the most dramatic and hilarious example, in the beginning I thought you guys were just going full retard on him but the more I watch this the more I’m convinced he has a dark side to him.
    It’s interesting, if you think about it, that the thanksgiving episode would have had to happen chronologically before the first episode. That means when he first pulled out that first random quote about buffalo meat snowmen, he wasn’t just pulling something completely out of his ass, he was reminding the group-incidentally, when Gunny was arguably being a bit of a dick to Commander Ice Goose-that he started a genocide once, goddamn it, and he can do it again. Someone on Facebook suggested a pirate special, I wouldn’t be surprised if one comes down the pipe, possibly with having a cameo with a certain actor who shall not be named, but who induces projectile vomiting in certain cast members and who’s last name rhymes with rage.

    Ice Goose is a character that is so far kind of underused by virtue of being the strai-well, straw man of the group. I wouldn’t be surprised, however to see him turn into a bit of a bad ass himself, especially if you get enough gin and juice in him. I understand he is a pretty good free styler, and probably has a few fireworks up his sleeves that we haven’t seen yet.

  56. Jose M Santiago

    November 30, 2012 at 12:46 pm

    “OH but the 4th of July”.

    Yes, this was my favorite moment. The moment that the 4th of July was regarded as the best holiday in the US.
    I believe that most people give way more attention and pay more respect to Halloween, Easter, Xmas, and fucking Valentines day than they do to Memorial Day, Veterans Day, and Independence Day. I think our country is so self absorbed and forget where we came from. I believe this is the reason our country is where it stands today. If your a patriot, they look at you like a freak. I you believe that dying for your fellow ranger is more important than being there for xmas with your family, they think you are a fucking psycho. Little do they know is that becuase of those reasons is why we are the country we are today.
    But no fuck it, lets sugar coat everything and give everyone a pat and the back and tell them everything will be alright. Lets just lie to ourselves and everyone else. Lets worry more abour dressing up like a skanky witch or dress up lime a condom. Im not asking anyone to thank us, but to remember where we came from. Dont let the media get you to buy a fucking IPAD for 6 and 5 year old son, when there are people who dont even have shoes. Sit down with those kids on the 4th of July and tell them why you dont need a fucking IPAD, tell them the sacrifices our country and our men and women have made.



  57. Midnight Clad

    November 30, 2012 at 8:00 pm

    My favorite moment involves the Halloween episode. It’s when the Army rhino gets called a hipster by the Marine dog. Then the Air Force bird is in Home Alone mode.

  58. Sean M

    November 30, 2012 at 8:59 pm

    When Rhino is talking about the people who could replace Nicholas cage in the expendables three. “That annoying fucking kid from the transformer movie would be better.

    I love the shorts. Keep them coming.

  59. KB Enquist

    December 1, 2012 at 1:36 am

    The only easy day was yesterday Squaw. Or! I just Poked a hontas! It’s six to one or half dozen the other to me.

  60. Steve Malbasa

    December 1, 2012 at 11:17 am


    I watched this clip in a crowded restaurant for the first time, at a bar, and started laughing hysterically in a completely inappropriate manner. Screw ’em, they don’t know what they were missing.

    I also loved “You’re just a pair of skinny jeans away from being a hipster”.

  61. Sonnys Mom

    December 1, 2012 at 5:37 pm

    My favorite Damn Few moment: Episode #3, when Sealy weighs in with dating advice. This is a total send-up of the very real problem of stolen valor and phony Navy SEALs. LOVED the way Rhino just can’t spit out “I’m a Navy SEAL” and Eagle barely gets it done (and is immediately surrounded by “SEAL groupies” (or “chicks” if you prefer)!
    According to SEAL veteran Don Shipley and POW Network, the may be as many as 300 (yes, 300) SEAL imposters for every genuine SEAL.
    1. http://sofrep.com/4620/the-scourge-of-navy-seal-imposters-part-one-2/
    2. http://sofrep.com/4620/the-scourge-of-navy-seal-imposters-part-one-2/

  62. Justin H.

    December 2, 2012 at 3:38 pm

    Halloween episode, when Coastie makes his appearance…devil dog asks him what he is supposed to be, Coastie starts to make a reference to Costner and devil dog immediately tells him “I don’t really give a fuck!”

  63. Emma

    December 4, 2012 at 1:16 pm

    The Damn Few is so full of greatness! Sealy’s rant is my favorite though. My husband coaches high school baseball. It’s horrifying to see potentially great young men momma’s-boyed into weak little whiners. Maybe Sealy and the Damn Few boys could come by for a little pep talk…

  64. Elihu

    December 4, 2012 at 8:36 pm

    My favorite part about the damn few is remember its when I won your fucking independence

  65. Thomas Vick

    December 5, 2012 at 6:08 am

    Whoaa , you can throw those things , Fuck ya !! , by far almost made me piss myself due to the fact that i chased a mf down with a tomahawk , and now thats all i hear quoted at the motorpool

  66. TimJ

    December 10, 2012 at 10:50 pm

    To select a single moment of “The Damn Few” as outstanding would be as to compare sunrises. Each has its own beauty and excellence. Keep up the great work!

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