Operation Ranger Up

Name the Rhino from The Damn Few Contest

By
Updated: December 6, 2012
damn

Everyone loves The Damn Few and you have noticed that the hard-nosed rhino (see what I did there?) doesn’t have a name. Since this is The Rhino Den, I conned Nick into letting us have a contest of Rhino proportions to come up with a name for our beloved beast.

In the comments section below, give us a name and why the Rhino should carry that particular moniker. Be creative, be specific, be…spectacular. Don’t forget to leave your real email address in the appropriate box (I am the only one who can see it) otherwise I can’t reach you to coordinate the delivery of an extraordinary prize package. We will let these simmer for a week and select a winner on 12/12/12.

Up for grabs is $100 in RU gift certificates and all 4 of The Damn Few t-shirts plus the honor of knowing that you were the one who named the Rhino.

Oh, and just for the record, I think Rob is an excellent name….just sayin’!

If you don’t want to enter the contest but still want to laugh your ass off by watching The Damn Few, just click here.

*UPDATE* We moderate our comments here, so if you don’t see your comment magically appear after you hit submit, please don’t go back and hit submit another 20 times…we just haven’t approved it yet!

 

 

Comments

comments

176 Comments

  1. Scott Bronikowski

    December 6, 2012 at 8:57 am

    Roger or Rogers, after Rogers’ Rangers.

    • Patty Crack N' Pack

      December 6, 2012 at 10:07 pm

      My vote goes for Roger, too.

  2. Justin

    December 6, 2012 at 9:43 am

    Harold Balldinger

    • Doug Thompson

      December 6, 2012 at 7:29 pm

      Sgt Bino as in binoculars

  3. Mr. Twisted

    December 6, 2012 at 11:01 am

    I think it’s clear that one name stands above the rest:

    Ragnar the Rhino.

    The name, though used in a humorous context in certain Army circles, literally means “mighty army.” It is, therefore, clearly the best choice.

    • AppalachianRanger

      December 6, 2012 at 2:05 pm

      Way to take my idea for a name. In B Co 2/75, a lot of circles used RAGNAR in place of “Ranger down” to tell his ranger buddies that there was about to be a bar fight. If you heard this being yelled, you were sure to witness the beat down of a douchey mouth runner that thinks his Affliction tee shirt makes him a MMA fighter. This is why it should be RAGNAR… RLTW

  4. Brian L

    December 6, 2012 at 11:12 am

    Naming someone such as the Rhino appeared to be an almost impossible task. How do you decide on a name for someone such as him? I reflected on my time in the service as well as my time in Iraq as a civilian security contractor, and then it hit me!

    The Rhino shall be named, Sgt Gurkha!

    For those that do not know, Gurkhas are enlisted out of Nepal to serve as units with both the British and Indian militaries. While there is a great deal of camaraderie amongst all of the troops the Gurkhas do not receive all of the same perks the British and Indians do while serving. However that has not stopped them from fighting along side them, especially the British since the early 1800s.

    I know Wikipedia is not the greatest source, but here is a little gem about the Gurkhas from there;

    Former Chief of Staff of the Indian Army, Field Marshal Sam Manekshaw, once famously said about Gurkhas: “If a man says he is not afraid of dying, he is either lying or is a Gurkha.”

    While I was in Iraq there was a story about the Gurkhas (worked for Global Security, one Brit or American per vehicle and the rest were Gurkhas or Fijians) in late 2004, coming back towards Mosul on Tampa when they were blocked in and ambushed. They took a couple of casualties so the Gurkhas dismounted and started eliminating threats. They went car to car and home to home inflicting great damage until there were no threats!

    Months later we had some of our guys pick up a spot in a Global convoy. As they approached the village where the ambush took place, people would damn near crash their cars to get out of the way for the Global guys.

    Rhino is a Gurkha at heart and luckily for us, in our Army, not serving with the Brits or Indians. He shows dedication, loyalty, patriotism, fierceness, and is relentless, much like the Gurkhas.

    So there it is folks, competition is over…..Sgt Gurkha it is! Or maybe First Sgt Gurkha!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gurkha

    • Antonio Aguilar

      December 6, 2012 at 6:51 pm

      I realize there are lots of Brians out there, some with the last initial of “L”, and a few who were probably in Iraq in 2004… but I have to wonder, is that Ghost 6?

    • defensor fortissimo

      December 6, 2012 at 7:02 pm

      Agreed, the story of bishnu shrestha also comes to mind, (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bishnu_Shrestha) or Dipprasad pun, or… Hell, about a 10th of the stories on badassoftheweek.com are dedicated to these fuckers. For that matter you could probably come up with a cool gurkha themed t-shirt. Between a badass motto, (it’s better to die than to be a coward,) a blood curdling war cry, (Ayo Gorkhali!-forward the gurkhas!) and a sweet looking signature weapon, they certainly contain vast posibilities

  5. Sgt Awesome

    December 6, 2012 at 11:27 am

    Michael Bolton.

  6. Sgt Awesome

    December 6, 2012 at 11:28 am

    Michael Bolton.

    Would be awesome.

  7. Kevcar

    December 6, 2012 at 11:55 am

    Of Course his name should be Bad Ass Motherfucker or Sgt. BAMF for short

  8. Derpy

    December 6, 2012 at 12:03 pm

    Ricky.

    Because Ricky the Rhino just sounds right, and because anyone named Ricky would have to make up for being named Ricky with lots of violence towards others.

  9. Tom W

    December 6, 2012 at 12:43 pm

    SGT Whatisname

    from Kipling’s Pharaoh and the Sergeant

    SAID England unto Pharaoh, “I must make a man of you,
    That will stand upon his feet and play the game;
    That will Maxim his oppressor as a Christian ought to do,”
    And she sent old Pharaoh Sergeant Whatisname.
    It was not a Duke nor Earl, nor yet a Viscount —
    It was not a big brass General that came;
    But a man in khaki kit who could handle men a bit,
    With his bedding labelled Sergeant Whatisname.

  10. Emma

    December 6, 2012 at 12:49 pm

    I thought his name was Ranger Rhino anyway. While not terribly creative, Ranger is a spectacular name. Specifically because Rangers are spectacular and awesome.

  11. Jose M Santiago

    December 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

    This is really tough since there are so many great names out there for this BAMF. Which SGM BAMF would not be a bad name either.
    We could also name him “TOP” since 1SG’s(in infantry units) are usually BAMF. There it is again BAMF. How about BAMFIC, SGM BAMFIC. That would be a great name since by just wathcing the episodes we all know who is in charge.

  12. Madnorskie

    December 6, 2012 at 1:04 pm

    Rudder.

    When I see that old grizzled Rhino with the WWII Ranger Diamond I think of those 2nd Batt guys climbing the cliffs at Point du Hoc. I’d name him Rudder in honor of their commander, Col James Rudder.

    That or go completely old school and name him Merrill.

  13. Shoppy

    December 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    I’m diggin’ the simple name Sarge, for obvious reasons.

  14. Christopher McCreary

    December 6, 2012 at 3:21 pm

    Roger Darby should be the rhino’s name in honor of both Roger’s rangers and the rangers of WW2.

  15. Christopher McCreary

    December 6, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    Darby Rogers

  16. Heavy Metal 34

    December 6, 2012 at 3:23 pm

    When I think of a name fitting for the the Rhino I think of one name. A name that causes Chuck Norris’ beard fist to punch himself, the Most Interesting Man in the World to always drink beer, make you believe it’s not butter, and make cool guys look at explosions.

    And that name is Rakkasan the Rhino.

  17. Antonio Aguilar

    December 6, 2012 at 6:55 pm

    I’m in agreement with a few people above, that he needs to be an NCO… and while I never was a ranger myself, Roger Darby sounds good though if I got to pick I’d name him Bill in honor of Old Bill.

    • Heavy Metal 34

      December 10, 2012 at 1:20 pm

      I guess I assumed he was an NCO, maybe even a 1SG, by how he acts lol. Never even thought that was a question.

  18. Ben

    December 6, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    No names required…only “Sarge”.

    • John G

      December 7, 2012 at 1:33 am

      Sarge is an insult directed toward the NCO. A sarge is a bottom feeder. so no sarge.

  19. Amber Cook

    December 6, 2012 at 7:07 pm

    Boone?

    Sorry I suck at names

  20. dalibor

    December 6, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    I vote Rick, then ole Balto can pull the “Ranger Ricky” card and then hyper violence ensues.

  21. Anne Evans

    December 6, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    Patton. -Enough said.

  22. Tyler

    December 6, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    My first pick would be “Rog” Roger Darby. I know others have suggested it prior, but I a completely agree with the idea. If I had to make another it would be Frank after the legendary Frank Merrill.

  23. Anne Evans

    December 6, 2012 at 7:12 pm

    Patton or MacArthur. Both were great men who never said ‘Yes’ just to please. Patton was BAMFIC if ever there was one. -Enough said.

  24. Raul Felix

    December 6, 2012 at 7:12 pm

    Ralph Darqueen, in honor of Ralph the Airborne Ranger song and The Darby Queen.

  25. Zack

    December 6, 2012 at 7:12 pm

    SGT Bone.

    1) NCOs are the backbone of the Army.
    2) The ladies like it.
    3) It’s a freaking awesome name.

  26. Raul Felix

    December 6, 2012 at 7:13 pm

    Ralph Darqueen, in honor of Ralph the Airborne Ranger song and The Darby Queen

  27. Karen

    December 6, 2012 at 7:14 pm

    CSM HardcoreMF

  28. Timothy Brewer

    December 6, 2012 at 7:15 pm

    Frank Merrill

  29. Adam Lipman

    December 6, 2012 at 7:16 pm

    The only name fitting this bastard of a rhino must be taken from a man enshrined in history for his bad-ass’ness…

    He is to be named: Rowdy Roddy Rhino…..Sgt Rowdy Roddy Rhino

  30. rabidogg02

    December 6, 2012 at 7:17 pm

    Howie…Howie Feltersnatch

  31. Paul Lell

    December 6, 2012 at 7:17 pm

    Audie York or Roger Patton

  32. James Johnson

    December 6, 2012 at 7:18 pm

    Tank- the tuffest m-f’er on the planet!!

  33. rabidogg02

    December 6, 2012 at 7:18 pm

    We’ll give this the old junior college try.
    Howie…Howie Feltersnatch.

  34. Dan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:19 pm

    Sergeant First Class Sebastian Savage.

    All the maladjusted Army folks I deal with seem to have gotten the idea to join up to escape the abuse of an awkward first name their parents bestowed on their crotchfruit, letting them be known only by some inherently sinister sounding surname.

    He’s definitely an SFC. He’s got the attitude of one who works for a living, and nobody becomes that much of an asshole unless their primary occupation is keeping their Joes alive despite the best efforts of a never-ending parade of wet-behind-the-ears LTs.

  35. Anne Evans

    December 6, 2012 at 7:19 pm

    Patton or MacArthur. Both were great men who never said ‘Yes’ just to please. Patton was BAMFIC if ever there was one. -Enough said. Henceforth and forever more, Patton it shall be!

  36. 3rdBattBestBatt

    December 6, 2012 at 7:19 pm

    I would name him (insert NCO rank) Sledge. What better name for a rhinoceros?

    I find it especially fitting since the Regiment has always been the sledge hammer of JSOC.

  37. Daniel

    December 6, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    We’ll give this the old junior college try.
    Howie…Howie Feltersnatch.

  38. Thaddius

    December 6, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    Chuckwayne

    Because it doesn’t get any more bad ass then a hybrid of Chuck Norris and John Wayne.

  39. James Johnson

    December 6, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    Tank- because it is the tuffest, meanest, bad-ass m-f’er on the planet!!

  40. Tyler

    December 6, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    Frank, after the legendary Frank Dow Merrill (My post did not show up, so I am doing this just in case. Please delete if duplicated.)

  41. John Welch

    December 6, 2012 at 7:22 pm

    Tex after Col. Robert Turner

  42. James Johnson

    December 6, 2012 at 7:22 pm

    Tank- because it is the tuffest, meanest, bad-ass mother fucker on the planet!!

  43. John

    December 6, 2012 at 7:22 pm

    I’d have to go with “Francis”. Why? Besides Francis Marion (Swamp Fox) and Francis Soyer (from the movie “Stripes”…the dude that says “ya call me Francis, I kill ya”), it is a far from obvious name and the kind that can be used in a scene. Like Sealy saying “we have LOTS of Francises in the Navy” or the Marine being a typical Marine asking him how he got such a pussy name. Itd be great.

    Rangers lead the way…down a path cleared by a Sapper.

  44. Patricia

    December 6, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    I think his name should be Benjamin after Colonel Benjamin Church.

  45. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    Prometheus. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy.

  46. Stephen

    December 6, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    Bill or Riley….because Rhino says “FUCK IT, WE’LL DO IT LIVE!”

  47. Fredrick Dwyer

    December 6, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    Ranger Rick

  48. Joey L

    December 6, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    You should name the rhino Joe
    Not because it is my name but for the reason that soilders in WW2 were nicknamed joe

    Insults against him could being call
    G.I. Joe
    Doe boy (WW 1 nickname)

  49. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    Prometheus should be the name of the Rhino in the Ranger Up cartoon series. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy.

  50. Francisco Delgado

    December 6, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    BLADE, ROGER BLADE. Roger for Rogers’ Rangers and Blade because when he gets close to you the last thing you will feel will be his cold blade getting inside you and his warm breath wispering in your ear ” Lead the Way… Mother Fucker”

  51. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    Prometheus should be the name of the Rhino in the Ranger Up cartoon series. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy. If not, then I suppose it was a horrible choice, and perhaps you should have stuck with the rough and tough image with a rough name….and sorry in advance if that name forever were to destroy the cartoon.

  52. Will Black

    December 6, 2012 at 7:26 pm

    Drew Dix. MOH in Vietnam.

  53. Terence Nelan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:26 pm

    Shaka. As in Shaka Zulu. Rhinos are native to south Africa where the Zulus live, and the Zulus are really fierce warriors. They even handed the british a defeat or two, using spears against rifles. Google Isandlhwana, and Rourkes Drift.

    G

  54. Patricia Mattox

    December 6, 2012 at 7:27 pm

    Not sure if you got this, but I think he should be named Benjamin after Colonel Benjamin Church.

  55. Terence Nelan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:27 pm

    Shaka. As in Shaka Zulu. Rhinos are native to south Africa where the Zulus live, and the Zulus are really fierce warriors. They even handed the british a defeat or two, using spears against rifles. Google Isandlhwana, and Rourkes Drift.

    Gurkha would be good, but I like Shaka better, since they both come from the same place

  56. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:30 pm

    Prometheus should be the name of the Rhino in the Ranger Up cartoon series. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy. I for one believe it would add a slight twist to the character. If not, then I suppose it was a horrible choice, and perhaps you should have stuck with the rough and tough image with a rough name….and sorry in advance if that name were to forever destroy the cartoon.

  57. T Deuley

    December 6, 2012 at 7:30 pm

    Sergeant Darby “Leg” Rogers……..Obvious reasons here!

  58. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    Prometheus should be the name of the Rhino in the Ranger Up cartoon series. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. If you had given me a list of names I would predict, it would be the typical bull crap, sarge, Rex, etc. Prometheus? Not a chance anyone would think he’s named Prometheus. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy. I for one believe it would add a slight twist to the character. If not, then I suppose it was a horrible choice, and perhaps you should have stuck with the rough and tough image with a rough name….and sorry in advance if that name were to forever destroy the cartoon.

  59. Chris D

    December 6, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    Jack, as in Jack Daniels

  60. Terence Nelan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    How about “Shaka”, as in Shaka Zulu. The Zulus were and still are fierce warriors who take no shit from anyone. Back in the day, armed only with spears, they even handed the British Army a defeat or two. Google “Isandlhwana” to see an example.

    Gurkha is a good name, but as rhinos are native to South Africa, where the Zulus come from, I like Shaka better.

  61. Jeffrey Roy

    December 6, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    Prometheus should be the name of the Rhino in the Ranger Up cartoon series. The reason being, everyone expects him to have a name just as rough and tough as he is. This would throw them a “curveball”. If you had given me a list of names I would predict, it would be the typical bull crap, sarge, Rex, etc. Prometheus? Not a chance anyone would think he’s named Prometheus. No one would expect the tough guy, to have a pretty wimpy and ridiculous name. This also offers a chance for the other characters to tease him, and hopefully make for good comedy. I for one believe it would add a slight twist to the character. If not, then I suppose it was a horrible choice, and perhaps you should have stuck with the rough and tough image with a rough name….and sorry in advance if that name were to forever destroy the cartoon. Oh well, either way, even if you do not choose the ridiculous name I have sprung upon the rhino, thanks for your time and good luck with the future of the show and Ranger Up product line.

  62. H. Henry

    December 6, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    Major Sore-ass/// Maj. R. Sore-ass /// Maj. Rhino Sore-ass /// a play on words for rhinoceros – and he’s a major sore ass grumpy grunt.

  63. Whomadewho36

    December 6, 2012 at 7:34 pm

    Roger Bravo. Simple, Roger’s Rangers and 11 Bravo.

  64. Dustin Phelps

    December 6, 2012 at 7:39 pm

    SGT Darby Danger

    Darby for the history (even though he was an officer) and Danger, because Danger is badass and rolls off the tongue!

  65. Nick Starling

    December 6, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    Roger Darby. You could do an episode about the “Darby Queen” and Roger could lose it thinking the guys are calling him a queen, and another episode about the name Roger and how military guys always poking fun and COMSEC by saying “Who is this guy ‘Roger’ everyone keeps talking about?” You could make a spin-off shirt that has Roger on it and says “I’m the Roger everyone is talking about”

  66. Andre Dwars

    December 6, 2012 at 7:41 pm

    Sergeant Darby, after BG William O. Darby .

  67. Terence Nelan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    I’m going to try one more time to leave this comment. Apologies if you get it more than once, Ive entered it twice but its not showing up

    how about Shaka, like Shaka Zulu. The zulus were fierce warriors and they even defeated the British a time or two using spears against Martini-Henry Rifles.

    Rhinos are native to South Africa, where the zulus are from.

    (apologies if this gets in more than once. ill stop now)

  68. Douglas Parkhurst

    December 6, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    I think you should name him “Grit” as in intestinal fortitude,or the kick ass John Wayne movie. Also slang for a smoke, such as ” let me get a grit from you”. The rhino represents this quality which needs to be more prevalent among Americans to counteract the hippie mind f**k that’s everywhere.

  69. Joey L

    December 6, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    You should name him Joe
    Not because it is my name because it was the nickname of the WW2 soldiers

  70. Andrew Lemacks

    December 6, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    Rabel the Rhino after SSG Laszlo Rabel.

  71. Andre Dwars

    December 6, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    Sergeant Darby, after BG William O. Darby a prestigous commander of the Army Rangers.

  72. Joey L

    December 6, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    You should name him Joe.
    Not because it is my name because it was the nickname of the WW2 soldiers.

  73. Andrew Lemacks

    December 6, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    Rabel the Rhino after SSG Laszlo Rabel. Only seems appropriate to give him a name with an “R”, unless you’re looking for a full name, in that case Laszlo Rabel!

  74. Joseph Girmann

    December 6, 2012 at 7:45 pm

    Nicanor
    Greek meaning victor,
    also, IT’S FUCKING AWESOME!

  75. Gabe Berdugo

    December 6, 2012 at 7:45 pm

    Lets break this down. The devil dog got “Gunny,” the Seal got “Sealy,” and the eagle got “Ice Goose.” The first two were simple since the devil dog is a marine and “gunny” is a nickname for Gunnery Sergeants and the seal is in the navy and he’s obviously a seal, which works out. Then you got Ice Goose, which I think is a reference to Top Gun, which is a movie about Navy pilots, but pilots no less. As for the Rhino, he’s an Army Ranger who sports the diamond patch, an obvious indicator that he’s from the WWII era. He’s hard, tough and rugged. The name “Sarge” always came to mind. It’s a hollywood nickname and it never goes over too well with modern army NCOs. But it’s catchy.

  76. Sean

    December 6, 2012 at 7:46 pm

    Rusty. Because its something he will not let his men or their gear become.

  77. Douglas Parkhurst

    December 6, 2012 at 7:46 pm

    I think you should name him “Grit” as in intestinal fortitude,or the kick ass John Wayne movie. Also slang for a smoke, such as ” let me get a grit from you”. The rhino represents this quality which needs to be more prevalent among Americans to counteract the hippie mind f**k that’s everywhere. Issues put on your armadillo helmets and fix bayonets, I would follow “Grit” straight through the depths of the hippie hordes.

  78. Brent

    December 6, 2012 at 7:48 pm

    Sue. Yes, because of the Johnny Cash song.

  79. Nick Cuningham

    December 6, 2012 at 7:48 pm

    Dirk Vlug, from the Army’s 126th Infantry Regiment, 32nd Infantry Division. Reason? here is the Medal Of Honor citation for his actions in WW2:

    “Loading single-handedly, he destroyed the first tank, killing its occupants with a single round. As the crew of the second tank started to dismount and attack him, he killed 1 of the foe with his pistol, forcing the survivors to return to their vehicle, which he then destroyed with a second round. Three more hostile tanks moved up the road, so he flanked the first and eliminated it, and then, despite a hail of enemy fire, pressed forward again to destroy another. With his last round of ammunition he struck the remaining vehicle, causing it to crash down a steep embankment. Through his sustained heroism in the face of superior forces, Pfc. Vlug alone destroyed 5 enemy tanks and greatly facilitated successful accomplishment of his battalion’s mission.” (more info at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dirk_J._Vlug)

    Thats pretty bad ass… very befitting of the Rhino.

  80. Douglas Parkhurst

    December 6, 2012 at 7:48 pm

    I think you should name him “Grit” as in intestinal fortitude,or the kick ass John Wayne movie. Also slang for a smoke, such as ” let me get a grit from you”. The rhino represents this quality which needs to be more prevalent among Americans to counteract the hippie mind f**k that’s everywhere. I say put on your armadillo helmets and fix bayonets, I would follow “Grit” straight through the ranks of the hippie hordes, and light my grit on the smoldering ashes of their lifeless corpses. Not for the weak or feint of hart.

  81. Tamara Davis

    December 6, 2012 at 7:49 pm

    Rhino’s name should be Porkchop!
    If not that, then how about Lambchop! (Just kidding)
    Cheeseburger has a nice “rhino-ish” sound to it…how about fries with ‘dat!

  82. Brendan

    December 6, 2012 at 7:49 pm

    SGT Jorgen. Hugh Jorgen.

    Or Spike.

    Whatever.

  83. Phelps

    December 6, 2012 at 7:52 pm

    SGT Darby Danger.

    Darby for the history (even though he was an officer) and Danger because it is bad ass.

  84. John

    December 6, 2012 at 7:54 pm

    Roughneck Rhino

  85. Steve Satterly

    December 6, 2012 at 7:54 pm

    Let’s see. Badass. Gets into goofy shit. Badass. Looks tough. Did I mention badass?

    That can only be Kennedy the Rhino.

  86. Steven A.

    December 6, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    I say Rocco Rhino. Mostly cuz when i hear the name Rocco, i think of buff, diesel ed mobsters, and from the picture above with the cigar, he kind of fits the profile.

  87. wolf

    December 6, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    i think it should be plumly after former sgt major plumly one of the greatest

  88. Kev Mitchell

    December 6, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    Hipster.

    just kidding …

    How about Hayt.

  89. D. Parkhurst

    December 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    I say you should name the rhino “Grit” as in intestinal fortitude, or the kick ass John Wayne movie. “Grit” is also a slang term for a smoke, as in “I need a grit after bumping uglies.” The rhino represents this quality which needs to be more prevalent among Americans to counteract the hippie mind f**k that’s everywhere. I say put on your armadillo helmets and fix bayonets, I would follow “Grit” straight through the ranks of the hippie hordes, and then I would light my grit on the smoldering ashes of their lifeless Birkenstock clad corpses. “Not for the weak, or feint of heart”.

  90. Matthew Rutledge

    December 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm

    Call him Randy in honor of fallen Medal of Honor recipient SFC Randall Shughart.

    He exemplified the Ranger core values and on that day in October 1993 displayed the fact that Rangers Lead The Way.

    Randy Rhino. Sounds good.

  91. Harbofdoom

    December 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    Damn you all for coming up names I was thinking so great minds think alike. My new suggestion is Sgt. R.R. Darby, or Sgt. Roger Rob Darby. The first and last name or obvious Historical references the Middle name is my attempt to butter up the judge. Come on pick me I never win these things.

  92. Levi

    December 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

    The Rhino should be named Merrill after the Merrill’s Marauders, one of the most distinguished units in US Army history.

    It’s also a sissy sounding name, which would help explain why he’s always so damned grumpy all the time.

    It would also lead to some good “fisticuffs” when the other members of The Damn Few find out about it.

  93. satch

    December 6, 2012 at 8:13 pm

    Walter or Eddie – both AWESOME WWII vets w/the 26th – Blue Spaders – Big Red One during the close of the The Big One! Walter KIA Silver Star 11-20-44 near Liege – now interned @ Henri Chappelle and Ed/Eddie Bronze Star AFTER taking machine gun fire across both legs and raising a damn fine family afterwards.

  94. Matthew Rutledge

    December 6, 2012 at 8:14 pm

    Name Him Randy after Medal of Honr Recipient SFC Randy Shughart. He exemplifies the Ranger Values and on that day in Oct 1993 he displayed to the world, his country, and most importantly his team mates who were down, that RANGERS LEAD THE WAY.

    Randy Rhino just sounds good too.

  95. Darrell Wyatt

    December 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

    Rakky Stoner. Rakky pronounced Rocky, since it’s a bad ass name, and is short for those crazy bastards known as Rakkasans. Stoner for the inventor of the tool that has been helping infantrymen spread nightmares and democracy to a country near you… The M16A1 assault rifle which later became the m16a2 and the father of the M4

  96. Mich

    December 6, 2012 at 8:16 pm

    Merrill R. Black
    – Merrill for Frank Merrill;
    – Black because the lip indicates that he is a Black Rhino (Diceros bicornis); and,
    – R for Rob.

  97. Darrell Wyatt

    December 6, 2012 at 8:22 pm

    it’s a bad ass name, and is short for those crazy bastards known as Rakkasans. Stoner for the inventor of the tool that has been helping infantrymen spread nightmares and democracy to a country near you… The M16A1 assault rifle which later became the m16a2 and the father of the M4 assault carbine

  98. Kyle Fox

    December 6, 2012 at 8:23 pm

    SFC Queen…Darby Queen.
    Can be called “Darby” the majority of the time.
    Plus the fact that his last name is Queen sets him up for all KINDS of shit talking!!!

  99. Kyle Fox

    December 6, 2012 at 8:29 pm

    Norman D.
    For the Battle of Normandy.
    SGT D for short.

  100. Brent

    December 6, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    Sue. Yes, from Johnny Cash.

  101. Mark August

    December 6, 2012 at 8:35 pm

    Sarge

  102. Floyd

    December 6, 2012 at 8:36 pm

    Rambo the Rhino

  103. Open Channel D

    December 6, 2012 at 8:40 pm

    Bronson Hardcock.

  104. Isiah Diaz

    December 6, 2012 at 8:44 pm

    Sergeant Dick (Dedicated Infantry Combat Killer)!!!!!!!! No more naming after pass legends…create our own Legend!!! Sergeant Dick leads the way! lol

  105. jeremy

    December 6, 2012 at 8:44 pm

    Merril as in merrills maruaders. Its kinda of sissy name so it explains his hardassness and it relfects a badass unit

  106. Matt P

    December 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

    I believe the rhino should be named Sgt. . Halt Who goes there!

  107. Doc 175

    December 6, 2012 at 8:49 pm

    Brutus; meaning- brute strength ; Latin.

    what else could you name him that would fit?!

  108. Jon Smallwood

    December 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm

    How about “Rhino Ranger Jones”…

    Here lie the bones
    Of Ranger Jones
    A graduate of this institution
    He died last night
    In his first firefight
    Using the School solution –BE FLEXIBLE!

    — tombstone outside the orderly room, US Army Ranger School

  109. Diaz

    December 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

    Or Ranger Joe, After the Military surplus store in Columbus, GA. love that store, especially after I got my Blue Cord.

  110. Canon Teague

    December 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

    Name him Knowlton after Thomas Knowlton who is credited with the first Ranger regiment during the American Revolution. Or name him Marion after Francis Marion (Swamp Fox) who is known for his guerilla warfare against the British with his rangers. (Plus Marion is John Wayne’s real name. Ha.)

  111. Luis Rosado

    December 6, 2012 at 9:29 pm

    CSM McCrotch, Phil McCrotch. SFC Curbstomp. Ralph, Bruno, Dino(pronounced DEENO). Or Jim, Jodie Killer Jim….. or Chuck

  112. dave fincher

    December 6, 2012 at 9:33 pm

    Robin, Percy, Leslie or some other ultra girl name so that he has to go by his nickname, Meat. ANd if anyone ever calls him by his given name, it would be perfectly acceptable to kill them where they stood.

  113. LR Hale

    December 6, 2012 at 9:36 pm

    Sgt. Clay Moore

  114. Jason Lee Strickland

    December 6, 2012 at 9:39 pm

    Why does he need to be named after anyone, I think his name should be something funny and maybe even a little fruity, like Francis, something that could be a humor point for the shows. It’s just my opinion.

  115. Zach Clevenger

    December 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

    “Walt”

    His smart assed attitude, and I’m a bad mother fucker ego reminds me a lot of the character Clint Eastwood played in the Movie Gran Torino – Walt Kowalski. He got fucked with a lot, but dished the shit out just as hard. That is my pick. And in the event he needs a last name…

    “Walt Rhinger”

  116. Scout

    December 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    Tecumseh Sherman. The Rino would have burned the South.

  117. Mark santos

    December 6, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    Name him Recon the ass kicking Rhinp
    Or just plain oh Recon Rhino

  118. Eric

    December 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    Insert NCO rank and Cannon, for two reasons, first Artillery as we all know is the king of battle and secondly Sgt. Cannon was my favorite Instructor during basic (despite being a complete hard ass/bad ass).

  119. Kevin

    December 6, 2012 at 10:14 pm

    SGT Forge. Valley Forge. Start at the Beginning

  120. Michael

    December 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

    Lando the Rhino. It rhymes which is pretty sweet and its after Or”lando” Darby the man for which “Darby’s Rangers” is named.

  121. Kevin Nielsen

    December 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    Since the Army seal shows the date of inception as 1776, SGT Forge (Valley Forge) or SGT Washington seem appropriate

  122. Michael W

    December 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    Lando the Rhino. It rhymes which is pretty sweet and lando is from OrLANDO Darby the head of Darby’s Rangers.

  123. Rock Force

    December 6, 2012 at 10:27 pm

    Du Hoc after the landing at D-day. He is wearing the historical WWII Ranger patch. Or James after James E. Rudder who led the assault.

  124. Jake

    December 6, 2012 at 10:35 pm

    Last name has to b after some badass (Patton, Rogers, Spartacus, Churchill something like that). I think his first name should be something sissy and laughable so there can be jokes about it (I’m partial to Francis or Sue). For the love of God give him an American name or at least one that sounds American, that’s his character. I mean Shaka Zulus a badass buuuuut… Just no. Oh by the way Churchill is after a WW1 Brit who fought the whole war with a sword and a longbow.

  125. Brad Osborne

    December 6, 2012 at 10:40 pm

    George based off of George Washington. General of the Continental Army and first President of the United States. Plus in one of the Damn Few episodes, the Rhino states that he crossed the Potomac River when he was arguing with Gunney about water operations

  126. Ryan

    December 6, 2012 at 11:09 pm

    Murphy – Audie Murphy (not a Ranger)
    Church – Benjamin Church
    Merrill
    Rogers
    Darby

  127. defensor fortissimo

    December 7, 2012 at 12:38 am

    On an unrelated note is anyone else curious about who the 6th silouhette on the far left is?

  128. Daniel Alexander

    December 7, 2012 at 12:50 am

    Merrill The Marauding Rhino. He has the old Ranger patch, take it back to the original Rangers. Plus, what’s scarier than a marauding rhino? Vader mask less?

  129. J boust

    December 7, 2012 at 12:55 am

    Everett Sondaicus Callahan

    Everett cause its kinda weird and would explain why hes so pissy

    Sondaicus cause its one of two species names for a rhinoceros-the other is unicornus. LOOK IT UP!

    Callahan cause its badass

  130. Outlaw6

    December 7, 2012 at 1:20 am

    SFC Crockett Plumley.

    In honor of David ‘Davy’ Crockett and CSM Basil Plumley.

    Two BAMFs that the Rhino would do proud.

  131. Name

    December 7, 2012 at 1:24 am

    Max “Fucking” Fightmaster. Because its what he does god damnit.

    or Todd, yeah, Todd…

  132. Eric

    December 7, 2012 at 1:26 am

    Sgt. Horny Bastard

  133. Ken walden

    December 7, 2012 at 1:31 am

    SSG HARD NOSE OR JUST HARD NOSE. WHY YOU MIGHT SAY. ONE BECAUSE HE IS A BAD &$$ RANGER AND SECOND RHINOS HAVE THE HARD @$$ IVORY TUSK. BESIDES WHO IS MORE SCARIER IN THE INFANTRY BUT A SSG WITH A BAD ATTUDE. That is all !!

  134. Seaao

    December 7, 2012 at 1:55 am

    Allison…. can’t you just picture it? Someone finds out… they say the name, and you hear nothing but crickets chirping, followed by someone starting to crack a joke about it. they get about one syllable out before becoming instant roadkill, followed by a few seconds of silence before everyone starts talking over each other about what a great name Allison is…. classic….

  135. Richard

    December 7, 2012 at 2:31 am

    Richard (dick) clint Johnson II not only is he named after me (I am a fucking legend) he has not one but 2 penis monikers for names but his middle name is a tribute to the manliest actor Hollywood has ever seen. Out.

  136. Richard

    December 7, 2012 at 2:38 am

    Richard (Dick) Clint Johnson II not only is he named after me (I am a fucking legend) he has not one but 2 penis monikers for names but his middle name is a tribute to the manliest actor Hollywood has ever seen. My middle names not Clint unfortunately it’s Paul. My nickname at school was Penis p. penis which sucked – hard. 4 damn few t-shirts would go along way toward easing the pain. Help me rhino den… You’re my only hope.

  137. Rob

    December 7, 2012 at 6:13 am

    Kilroy

    SGT Kilroy “Hawk” Rhino.

    Kilroy to go with the RANGER Diamond of WWII
    “Hawk” for tomahawks or keeping our hatchets at the ready to finish em off.

    And finally, Rhino as his last name for Rhino den.

  138. Big Daddy Perkins

    December 7, 2012 at 7:35 am

    Elvis because well that’s awesome, or Richard because balto can call him dick, pompous pat the air farce eagle can call him sir Richard and if balto calls him Ricardo then Seally can think he said retardo and think they are in the same club

  139. Big Daddy Perkins

    December 7, 2012 at 7:36 am

    Elvis because well that’s awesome, or Richard because balto can call him dick, pompous pat the air farce eagle can call him sir Richard and if balto calls him Ricardo then Seally can think he said retardo and think they are in the same club.

  140. Kris Perkins

    December 7, 2012 at 7:52 am

    Choice 1 is Elvis
    Choice 2 is Richard why, balto can call him dick, pompous pat can call him sir Richard and if someone calls him Ricardo then Seally can mistake that for retardo and believe they are in a special club together. Let that awesomeness sink in.

  141. Cecilio Mendez

    December 7, 2012 at 8:41 am

    A rhinoceros who likes to eat meat has to be a mutant, so I propose to name him “Mutt” or “SGT Mutt” which is an effort to identify him for what he is, while keeping it short. The old guys (like me) would be reminded of the comic strip “Mutt & Jeff”. Dogs (Devil dogs, AKA Marines) are also referred to as mutts.

  142. Mike Collins

    December 7, 2012 at 8:48 am

    Sgt. Dilligaf (does it look like I give a fuck).

  143. Keith "Oly" Olson

    December 7, 2012 at 9:07 am

    Being an Air Force Vet… he should be named Ranger Rick…

    Seriously, keep up the awesome work!

  144. Mighty Irony

    December 7, 2012 at 9:39 am

    The name should be Sue. Just think of the Johnny Cash song, fits the Rhino, or should I say Sue, perfectly. It’s why Sue is so angry all the time, just think of the endless opportunities for the jokes. I am laughing already.

  145. Michael Combs

    December 7, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    The Mighty Hardcore………….from a poster we had in basic training

  146. Oscar Fields

    December 7, 2012 at 7:41 pm

    Seargent Major IDGF (I Dont Give a F…)

  147. these things i say

    December 7, 2012 at 8:15 pm

    None of Your Fking Business

    I mean, it’s not like you’re his mother.

  148. Midnight Clad

    December 7, 2012 at 8:18 pm

    I think he should be named “Sam” in honor of the actor Sam Elliot, who played that kick ass SGT. Major in “We Were Soilders Once And Young.”

    • C.K.

      December 9, 2012 at 11:43 am

      Sgt. Major Plumley was an actual person (died this past Oct at the age of 92), and more kick ass in life then as portrayed in the movie. Sam Elliot did a fine job though, and it will always be one of my favorite roles he played.

      Sam is a good choice. Something with Basil or Plumley, as well.

  149. C.K.

    December 7, 2012 at 8:19 pm

    Francis Audie Rogers

    Francis for Francis Marion (Swamp Fox), Audie for Audie Murphy, and Rogers for Roger’s Rangers.

    He goes by Rogers. If anyone calls him Francis, he wouldn’t hesitate to beat them into a bloody pulp.

  150. Ken walden

    December 7, 2012 at 11:40 pm

    Hardnose frank. Because rhinos have that awesome hard ivory tusk for kicking some @$$ just like RU.

  151. Fabian smith

    December 7, 2012 at 11:58 pm

    Ranger Rick, why? Cause its manly, it’s Ranger, & it rolls of the tongue, Rhino Ranger Rick. Carry on.

  152. Zach M>

    December 9, 2012 at 1:59 am

    Either Basil (after CSM Plumley) or Randy Rhino (Randy Shugart)

  153. Jeff Coulter

    December 9, 2012 at 3:08 am

    I know what it won’t be. Hipster.

  154. Paul Roy

    December 9, 2012 at 9:43 pm

    Randy S. Rhino (The S would stand for Shughart.)

  155. J.B.

    December 10, 2012 at 1:32 am

    SGM Frank “Balls of Steel” Slaughter

    -Frank because his mother named him Francis and any kid who grew up with that name had to be tough at a young age. His “take no shit from anyone” attitude help mold him to the man he is today. Also, for Francis “Swampfox” Marion.

    -“Balls of Steel” because anyone who has served in Ranger Battalion knows that there are just those old school guys still in that have trouble walking around with those things…but can ruck their asses off.

    -Slaughter after the iconic wrestler from the 1990’s wrestler SGT Slaughter who rocked a Drill Sergeant ensemble during his days in the ring.

    All of them combined together just roll of the tongue.

  156. AppalachianRanger

    December 10, 2012 at 1:21 pm

    Ralph the Airborne Ranger! End of disscussion!!

  157. Heavy Metal 34

    December 10, 2012 at 1:46 pm

    After scrolling through these suggestions I feel like I need to point something out. Stop fucking proposing names in honor of MOH recipients or SMAs or any of the like because “he was the most badass” or “so and so was the best…” Wrong. Adjust fire and drive on. Not one of the MOH recipients is better than the other. That is just downright distasteful. Most lost their lives, were dismembered, or otherwise scarred for life and to say that one is better or more badass than the other is just wrong.

    Now that I’ve stepped off my soapbox I’m still in favor of my previous submission for Sergeant Rakkasan for my aforementioned reasons.

    But I’d like to put another name in for submission. And that would be SFC FOY or Sergeant Foy because in my mind the Rhino portrays the type of soldier that, despite all odds, will accomplish the mission.

    To refresh your memory, at Foy (aka the Battle of the Bulge) The 506 lost tons of soldiers to indirect fire, and obviously direct fire, during one of the worst winters imaginable and still captured the town which can be argued was a vital victory in WW2. To name the Rhino Sergeant Foy would permanently describe him as a BAMF and the end all, be all soldier.

  158. Scott hyderkhan MSG (Ret)

    December 10, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    A good name would be Sergeant Major Rhino. The significance is that the NCO Corp is the key to the success and provides continuity in the Ranger Regiment.
    Thanks MSG Hyderkhan (Ret)

  159. Ben

    December 11, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    Ok, so make it an Xmas special – his name is “Dolph” (like Dolph Lundgren) but the rest of the Few check his DD214 and find out his real name is “Rudolph.” And his horn is actually red and shiny, not like the reindeer, but a WMD like Cyclops from the X-men. Boom. Incomparably awesome.

  160. Zac

    December 12, 2012 at 2:53 am

    Rob “Wreckin” Rayner

    Or without the Wreckin, whichever

  161. Melvin

    December 12, 2012 at 10:01 am

    How bout Hannibal, in reference to the military conqueror and, of course, the A-team?

  162. GI Joey

    December 12, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    Norman! He could hate it when people call him that, and it’s an obvious reference to Normandy…

  163. Brian L.

    December 17, 2012 at 10:18 am

    Winners???

  164. Sgt C

    December 23, 2012 at 3:03 am

    If nobody else has previously suggested this name, I propose Darby.

  165. Ryan

    December 26, 2012 at 6:56 pm

    SGT Smoke

    a reference to his love of smoking and the need to correct soldiers.

  166. Matt

    December 28, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    Sgt. Fisticuff

  167. GJ

    December 31, 2012 at 6:57 am

    Joe, as in G.I. Joe, obviously!

  168. Copper

    April 18, 2013 at 4:27 pm

    Darby, after Darby’s rangers or ranger Rick

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