RTFU

MMA is Like Child Porn. Wait…What?!?

By
Updated: February 27, 2013
steve hickey

Follow us on Twitter @TheRhinoDen

By SGT Awesome  @sgtawesome1ea

Steve Hickey is a name you’ve likely never heard, and it’s a name you’ll never likely want to hear again once I am done. You see, Steve is a House Representative from District 9 in South Dakota and he is a douchebag.

Is it because Pastor (yes, he’s a Pastor too) Steve sponsored a bill to have elective Bible study in public schools and said:

“I would tell those who fear this, now you know how Christians feel when they send their kids off to a public school that is overtly hostile and propagates secular humanism. The pressure from that perspective to teach secular humanism in high school and college is far, far greater than proselytizing in a Bible course.”

No. Well, yes. Ignoring the Constitution of the United States as an elected official does make him a douchebag, but that is not why I bring him up nor is it his foreshadowed future creationist attacks on science.

It happens to be that Steve here has a blog, and on February 23rd he decided to “pick a fight” (his words) about Senate Bill 84 which would create an athletic commission in South Dakota to oversee boxing, kickboxing and MMA. The target of his ire? MMA “the most violent sport” of course! I personally think he just doesn’t appreciate the ground game, but that is neither here nor there; his ultra-doucheness is. You see, to make his point as to why MMA should be banned (which the governor of the state agrees with) he decided to use the tool of analogy very fucking poorly:

“We allow parents to discipline their kids to a point, we allow people to drive up to certain speeds; with smoking we draw the line after tobacco and before pot; with ‘adult entertainment’ we draw the line at child porn. Where do we draw the line with violent entertainment? I suggest we draw the line at cage fighting.”

Untitled-8Yes, he analogized mixed martial arts with child pornography. While his principle “we draw a line elsewhere” of the analogy is sound, the fact that he used the single worst thing ever in his analogy has brought a massive amount of attention his way. Frankly though, once you search through his Facebook, Twitter, and blog you find out quickly that he really is little more than an internet troll.  I believe he chooses his words very thoughtfully and with the full intent of gaining name recognition and while I would generally advise against feeding the troll, I think this particular douche finally bit off more than he can chew.

In the same blog post he uses another analogy saying that fighting within a cage is morally equitable to rape. Yes, rape, the Republicans’ favorite foot in mouth talking point.

“The psychological community will tell you that desensitization to violence works exactly like desensitization to porn. You know how porn progresses… a peek at topless isn’t enough, it all has to come off, then a pic is not enough… it goes to video then to virtual and then to the devaluation and mistreatment of women, human trafficking and sex crimes against women. Violence works the same way. Boxing wasn’t enough so they allowed kicking, kneeing people in the head, then elbows to the face, then they put a cage around it.”

Oh and meth use? Yeah, that made it in an analogy too:

“Proponents say [MMA is] going on here already so we need to regulate it to make it safe. Meth use is going on here too, should we regulate Meth labs?”

He then points out his governor’s thoughts:

“I’m offended that the state would legitimize cage fighting and the bloody violence these kinds of spectacles create… the way one wins in those contests is by beating up your opponent, bloodying them, kicking, scratching, punching.”

Because we’ve all seen an MMA match won via scratching…

It quickly becomes obvious he and his cohorts are oblivious to what MMA actually is and they remind me of the 2013 version of John McCain, who called MMA “Human Cockfighting” back when there were little to no rules in a typical MMA match; when MMA was represented more so by martial arts practitioners versus practitioners of other martial arts as opposed to today’s MMA which is competition between athletes well versed in multiple disciplines of martial arts.

Back to his words:

“Mixed means plus. It means not just this, it means that too. It’s this, plus this, plus that, plus that. The other martial arts don’t have all ‘that’ as there is line that is drawn. Mixed means a free for all. Who knows what the MMA people will mix in next? Sooner or later this will morph into more than it is today. That’s the nature of violence; it escalates as we are desensitized to it”

I really have a hard time responding to such ignorant rationalization. Does he really think the UFC 500 is going to involve tridents? He may, though I doubt it. When I headed over to his response blog post titled “An Open Letter to Christian MMA Fans and Fighters” I quickly surmised that he really doesn’t care what MMA is. When he used the phrase “Who would Jesus elbow in the face?” followed shortly by a link to a book he wrote, I decided this douche truly is a troll; creating as much controversy as he can to elevate his notoriety and nothing more. Fortunately for me, I happen to live in North Dakota which may soon see a boost in our local MMA shows! However, if you’d like to hamper my happiness and you live in South Dakota, I suppose you could vote for someone else next cycle.

For now however, I officially nominate Steve Hickey to represent District 47 in Douchebagistan from now until eternity. And if you live in South Dakota and want to let him know you support his nomination, let him know.

However, I must stress, logic and well thought arguments are the constituents’ job. Vitriol is mine.

Comments

comments

8 Comments

  1. Shane

    March 5, 2013 at 9:56 am

    As a Christian, I can tell you I have no problem with MMA fighting. It’s not once given me the urge to go have a backyard brawl or look up some child porn. The current state of organized (read REGULATED) MMA seems to be fine. I may be speaking out of turn since I’m not a hardcore fan, but come on. Stann & Silva’s post fight interaction in the locker room, away from the cameras, says it all! Yes, they are competitors. Yes, Silva won by KO. But that image of a bloody Stann with his arm around Silva, both smiling, is what it’s all about!

    Other than Bisping…I hate Bisping…

  2. Victoria

    March 5, 2013 at 4:36 pm

    Hickey seems to know an extensive amount about the different kinds of porn out there. I see a hidden sex addict trying to claw it’s way out. He’s a close minded pompous ass that is grandstanding to get attention. He is the very reason I have a problem with codified religions.

  3. Antonio Aguilar

    March 6, 2013 at 2:49 pm

    Please, for the love of God, don’t lump Christians in with this douchebag! I would throw holy water on this turn but I think it would burn him, and that of course would be violent and he would blame that violence on the fact that I sometimes watch MMA, and we would accomplish nothing…

  4. matt

    March 8, 2013 at 11:30 am

    I didn’t even read the whole article. I knew he was a douche when I saw the hipster glasses and goatee.

  5. Bill Breault

    March 18, 2013 at 10:23 am

    All you had to say was politician and I’d have known immediately that he was a douche…

  6. Cory Cody

    March 21, 2013 at 5:43 pm

    Why does it seem South Dakota only makes the news for negative reasons(Payne Stewart air plane crash, Green Peace climbing Mt. Rushmore, Pro-Life bill dust up,etc.). I am a South Dakotan and have been following this story very closely. Rep. Doo-Hickey is from a fairly liberal part of the the state, though that is not an excuse for his comments, or explain his Douche-tastic choice of words. I am happy to pass on to all in the Rhino Den community that the bill to sanction these events was passed and our Gov. did reverse course and ended up signing the bill into law.

  7. Smitty

    September 14, 2013 at 10:37 am

    this has to be the worst article ive ever read here.

    start at the top. Find where in the constitution an elective bible study is a violation. We have the freedom to practice any religion we choose and not have the government interfere with the free practice there of. if the author of this article has some moronic idea that separation of church and state shows up in the constitution, id advise him to read it before making claims as to what is and is not unconstitutional. the government is not allowed to intrude into religion, allowing an election, that means optional, bible study does not violate anyone’s constitutional or imagined rights of any kind. in fact, it allows for the free practice of religion promised in the constitution.

    as to his opinions on MMA, are we not all allowed to our opinions? he makes valid points, even if his choice of analogies is a bit bizarre. he doesnt draw a correlation between child porn and MMA, he says we draw a line. we allow pornography, but we set an age limit for it, he believes we should set the line for violent sports above boxing and below MMA. i personally disagree with him, but he is welcome to his opinion. his constituents elected him and he represents them. He has a valid argument about the growth of MMA. once something is allowed, it opens the door for the next thing that pushes the limits. i find it highly unlikely that our society would allow gladiatorial fights to the death, but he is welcome to his belief. i didnt think Clinton implementing DADT would lead to my Rangers having to “reevaluate their standards” to make sure women can pass, but it seems to be happening. heaven forbid (am i allowed to use that term?) someone disagree with you, he must be a douche of the week. i am disappointed that this is even on here.

  8. Aaron

    September 18, 2013 at 7:38 pm

    I feel ashamed to have South Dakota as my home of record…Fucking tards!

More in Douche of the Week, Featured Writer (129 of 276 articles)

Get notified of new Rhino Den articles and videos as they come out, Also, find out before anyone else about new product launches and huge discounts from RangerUp.com, the proud parent of the Rhino Den.

  • Videos (The Damn Few and more!)
  • Military-inspired articles
  • MMA (and Tim Kennedy) coverage
Close this window

Join the Rhino Den / Ranger Up Nation