General’s Controversial Graduation Speech Sparks Riots, 11 Killed

From our friends at The Duffel Blog

Sand Hill, Fort Benning, Georgia – Many soldiers and family members are angry over reports of controversial remarks from the Commanding Officer of Fort Benning at a recruit graduation.

Speaking to an assembled crowd of new soldiers and their families at basic training graduation, Major General Robert Brown was reported as “extremely hostile.”

His speech began with the “standard fluff” about duty, country, and the privileges of serving when such a small percentage of the country chooses a career in the Armed Forces. The speech took a turn, however, when the General reached a point in his remarks, obviously reused from previous ceremonies.

“Look to your left and right towards your brothers in arms,” said General Brown. “You’re all now members of a proud warrior class, and heroes like your fathers before you who-”

The General stopped, took a deep breath and crumpled the sheet before flinging it to the ground.

“Fuck it! I can’t read shit like this anymore. Listen up you little bald bastards.”

The newly minted soldiers — trying to stay awake throughout the ceremony — shifted uncomfortably in their seats at the sudden change in tone.

“Some of you fucks won’t make it past AIT [Advanced Individual Training]. You’ll wash out with the rest of the weakness that never should have been here in the first place. Most of you who do graduate will immediately go to combat units and deploy overseas. Many of you will threaten to kill yourselves to get out of real work, although you won’t have the balls to actually do it!”

Brown’s tone got softer as he attempted to clarify.

“Don’t get me wrong here. Many of you will actually go fight and engage the enemy in close combat. For that I salute you. It takes a hard motherfucker to go kill people you’ve never met just because we say so.”

The General then resumes his “motivational speech” to what he referred to as “the rest of you shit-stains.”

“You’ll most likely spend your deployment sitting on a FOB, manning guard towers, or waiting to go on patrols that get cancelled. I have a reality check for you all. Not everyone in this room is a hero. I don’t give a shit what the beer commercials say. You drag your buddy out of a grape hut after you’ve stabbed two Taliban in the eyes with a broken MRE spoon then you’re a motherfucking American Hero. You clear a trench with nothing but a sack of hand-grenades and your giant brass balls, and then you’re a motherfucking hero! But walking through the desert for three months without hearing a shot fired in anger and posting pictures in your combat gear doesn’t make you a goddamned hero! I don’t care what your family says. They’re not heroes. Neither are your fucking wives. Hardest job in the Army, my ass! Damn it, I’m too old for this shit. Fuck you all.”

There is more here…

8 Comments

1. 

   PFC Kinsey, Ryan

   July 28, 2012 at 10:43 pm

   That is fucking epic! He is right though.

   Reply
2. 

   RiderInTheNight

   July 28, 2012 at 11:00 pm

   HOAAAAH, Gen. Brown!

   Reply
3. 

   DOC HALLIDAY

   July 29, 2012 at 6:37 am

   URAAH-Enough of spoon feeding our young people. It is time someone stood up and told these young people what reality is. When a young person decides to enlist, they are making a conscious decision to become a warrior. When assigned as a clerk or gunner they are all basic infantry.
   The profanity might have been toned down because of the women present (not the female warriors, but the parents and girl friends.

   Reply
4. 

   Jerry

   July 29, 2012 at 7:08 am

   Umm quite becoming for a so called leader..he wouldn’t of made a pimple on my COs ass when I was in..We’d handled him very effectively on patrol..oops..But he did have some interesting observations but he didn’t mention anything about his heroic actions or should I say the lack of

   Reply
5. 

   SHAWN BEAL

   July 29, 2012 at 3:50 pm

   I think this is the most honest thing I have heard come out of someones mouth in a long time. I am glad he said what alot of people would like to say, however it isn’t socialy correct. Just because you join the military or your the spouse of a soldier doesn’t make you special. And I agree all these posting on military sposes and how hard there job is I don’t get it. There are many family’s that have spouses that are gone for long periods of time and you don’t see any of them asking for sympathy or freebee’s. Thatnks for saying what these kids need to hear.

   Reply
6. 

   Gunship Load

   July 29, 2012 at 3:51 pm

   If only it were true….

   I am so tired of coddling grown men….

   Reply
7. 

   Douglas Meeks

   July 29, 2012 at 3:56 pm

   Uh, you guys do know this is a joke? Right? Google it

   Reply
8. 

   Matt

   August 5, 2012 at 6:06 am

   Brilliant!

   Also, this further supports my strong belief that MRE spoons are one of the singularly most valuable and useful pieces of equipment provided by the Army.

   Reply