By Jack Mandaville I want to make a few of my...
Crazy Army Wives
By RU Contributor Madeline Monday
My experiences with the FRG weren’t exactly great ones, but I want to preface this little rant with a sincere thank you and expression of ultimate respect for the Army wives out there who support their Soldier with loyalty, respect, and unconditional love. The military couldn’t run without them…..now for the rest of these cunty skanks!
My husband and I got out of the Army a few years ago and recently moved back to Ft. Bragg. Last weekend we went out to a bar downtown and we were sitting next to a group of women who were ranting about their husbands and the “super sassy” things they had said and done recently. Then one got up, begins to flirt with and eventually leaves with some other guy. The other girls gossiped about it but excused her behavior by saying “ Well her husband deployed AGAIN!” The next day a girlfriend of mine and I started talking about the worst or craziest things we had seen Army wives do to Soldiers in our time in the military.
These are the top ten:
1. Had a soldier served with divorce papers while he was in the field. Literally, she drove his truck out to the training area, got out, threw the papers at him and drove off.
2. Didn’t go pick him up from redeploying because she was training for a marathon and was out running.
3. Posted pictures on Facebook of her boyfriend playing with her deployed husband’s dog with his truck in the background at the beach.
4. Told his kids that he died in Iraq and wasn’t coming back.
5. Said he couldn’t be in his buddies wedding because he would have to walk down the aisle and dance with another girl.
6. Called his commander and asked that he not be allowed to leave the company during lunch and that he had to call her after final formation which gave him 14min to get from the company to the house.
7. Recorded him bitching about and calling his 1SG several unprofessional names, the next time they got in a fight she drove up to the company and played it for Top. (cunty…..but it was really funny from the 3rd party perspective).
8. Demanded all his email passwords. Once on his AKO, realized he had a NIPR account he failed to disclose, she email a video of him masturbating to everyone in his AKO contact list. Everyone. Subject Line: “Bryan likes to hide things from his wife.” One of the more shocking emails I ever got.
9. Got mad and took every piece of Army equipment the guy had in his garage and cut it into pieces or burned it 17 days before he deployed. CIF statement of charges was $3800.00
10. And the winner…. Crazy McCunty sees her husband talking to another woman at a ball, runs up and throws a drink on her screaming “ Bitch, who the fuck are you?” The lady’s reply: “I’m CPT so and so, the new Chaplain”
What are some of the crazy things you have seen Army wives (or husbands for that matter) do? Funniest one gets a t-shirt to celebrate our addition of a female writer.