RTFU

About Johnny Atkins

By
Updated: May 8, 2009

Although loathe to admit it, Johnny is the son of a former Army officer who did not serve in combat arms. Thus began a childhood filled with angst, adventure, poitical curiosity, and stays in such exotic locales as West Berlin, Vicenza Italy, Amsterdam, and spectacular Fort Sill, Oklahoma. In the course of his formative years, Johnny and his family hung out with several outstanding Airborne, Artillery, and Infantry officers and their families, giving him a strong insight into what it means to serve in the Army and be commissioned as a military officer in the service of this great nation.

After briefly attending college, Johnny enlisted in the Marine Corps from Colorado Springs, Colorado in 1993, thereby salvaging a few scraps of dignity and self-worth. After serving five years on active duty as an Engineer, Johnny briefly returned to the private sector to remind himself how spineless and ignorant many civilians are before returning to the Marine Corps Reserve in June 2001. He then proved himself retarded enough to leave a contracting job inside NORAD and volunteer for over a half-dozen year-long mobilizations since. His colorful – though by no means distinguished – career has seen him travel to Monterey, California, Cuba, Korea, Okinawa, and 29 Palms among other places, with two combat tours in Iraq, (Ramadi and Haditha). He is currently deployed aboard the USS Gunston Hall conducting training in West Africa. Many have said, however, that God hates him for causing him to spend a vast majority of his career at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, where he currently lives.

Johnny enjoys reading while moving his lips, loves animals, and has been lauded by certain members of the infantry community for his ability to beer-bong a six-pack of Guinness. He is not actually an MMA competitor with a record of 48-2-0, nor has he been tabbed as a Ranger… but he did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night. He once relieved himself on the Eiffel Tower in 2002, and is currently batting .500 at NJP proceedings held in his honor. His prized posessions are his 1968 Pontiac GTO, his Mossberg 500, and the lone Marine Corps Good Conduct Medal he has ever earned.

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One Comment

  1. Galen Silago

    October 21, 2010 at 8:57 pm

    Good Read!

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